Anwar went to Egypt to see his family and mostly he hasn't been writing to me. He wrote to say we'll talk later. Is he still my guy? I got to exploring that idea within myself.
I really hope that he is not breaking up with me. I hope we get married and live happily ever after. But what if there's an end to us, and what if this is it?
If this is it? I'm glad I kept his interest long enough to get to know him and love him for who he is.
I'm not always that lucky.
A couple years ago I lost a guy so fast I'll never know who or what he was, how to characterize or justify my feelings, or why he quickly decided that, if there really was to be a lady in his future, it probably wasn't going to be me. And then when I tried to remenisce about him there really wasn't that much footage to enjoy. I made the best of it but you can see how frustrating it was to have a beginning and ending with no middle in between.
If I ever lose Anwar at least I'll have the memories and I'll know what I lost. I'll know where I've been, so if I keep looking back it won't be to ask myself questions that have no answer. If I keep looking back it will be because I love Anwar and I appreciate the time we had together.
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